One of the most interesting sources for LGBT news from the Episcopal Church’s General Convention will be Integrity’s convention portal.

Integrity identifies itself this way:

Since 1974, integrity has been a faithful witness of God’s inclusive love to the Episcopal Church and the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community.  We are working for the full inclusion of all the baptized in all the sacraments.

This portal provides links to  updates, tweets, blogs and so forth on stuff of specific interest to the LGBT community.

For more general information, check out the Episcopal Church’s main website.  Note the big banner claiming the church “welcomes you.”  Here’s hoping that is soon true.

Why in heaven’s name am I writing about a heckuva big church meeting?

Well, because one of the main reasons I chose to focus my mystery series around the life of a lesbian Episcopal priest stems from my witnessing of the LGBT community’s struggles for full inclusion in the Episcopal Church.  I’m not a particularly churchy person, though I believe I am a faithful one.  However, I have several close friends who are churchy–who, in fact, are priests.  And gay.   And while I have not cared much about what churches officially think of me in decades (because I long ago gave them up as hubs for judgmental hazing), my friends do care.  So I started paying attention.

Six years ago, I visited the convention just as Gene Robinson’s election as Bishop of New Hampshire was confirmed.  Many of you know Gene is the first openly gay person to reach that office and his selection as bishop kicked off a firestorm of anti-gay sentiment around the globe.  But on the evening in which he celebrated his first Eucharist as the newly confirmed Bishop-Elect, I stood in the crowd and wept.  My emotions stunned me.  I didn’t think I cared.  I’m still not particularly churchy, but it is an amazing thing to walk into a place that has always “hated” you and realize here, now, you are not hated.  I think that was the first time in my life I stood inside a mainline Christian church that had accepted me and others like me, without any “love the sinner, hate the sin” caveats.

Three years ago I witnessed the election of Katharine Jefferts Schori as Presiding Bishop, the first female “primate” of the Anglican Communion.  It kicked off a firestorm of anger around the globe.   I was also present as the governing bodies debated–often in horrific hate-filled terms–the full inclusion of baptized LGBT folks in the sacraments of the church.  That was the first time I’d ever been in a room with that level of hate (I guess I can count myself lucky that until then I’d only seen it on TV.)  In my opinion, there was little of the Good News of the Gospel evident in what transpired for LGBT folks as the delegates adopted a moratorium on giving full inclusion to the LGBT community.  We wept again, only this time in sadness at the victory of hate and fear and sin.  Change had seemed so possible; hope made the continued discrimination even more horrible to bear.

It was after this experience that I decided to write about a priest wrestling with these issues in her own life, trying so very very hard to be a person of faith holding to a religion which she just knows grows from something other than the narrowness that defines it for so many.  I actually dreamt about Lonnie Squires and the folks of Middelburg.  They came swirling whole out of the mists of my own life-long querulous relationship with the church. I’d like to be contented with religion some day.  I’d like for it to be contented with me.  But maybe that’s not how dynamic spirituality works.  I don’t know.  That’s why I explore it through Lonnie’s investigations of mysteries.

So, I look forward to this next triennial convention with no expectations for a good or a bad outcome for the LGBT faithful.  I only know that heroes will step forward again, working to change the world.  That hate and love will clash, both in the name of Christ.  That hearts will be wrung out and broken no matter what happens.  Everyone cannot be kept happy.  So what “good” will those in power choose?  What will the nature of the “loss” be?  Will some be kept out so that others will continue to come?  Or will all be invited, perhaps moving others to choose to leave?

To me, these are easy questions and the path that should be chosen is clear.  I’d be a lousy politician in a situation like this convention.  But that’s why I’m a novelist and others, thank God, are doing the hard work of transforming hearts and minds right there in the Anaheim Convention Center.  I’m not going this year, by the way.  I don’t think I could take it if things go badly.  I can’t stand watching my friends’ hearts broken again in the name of Christ.  Those who are there are so very much braver than I!

In my next post, I’ll list some websites of interest in case you want to keep up on all of this with me.

I recently set up a facebook account. I love the idea of using it to help readers find out more about me and my books. But ultimately I hope folks will visit the blog. It’s all I can do to keep one thing updated! But I recently read an article that 65% of lesbians use facebook (slightly less for gay men, both compared to less than 50% of the heterosexual population). At first this surprised me, but once I thought about it, it made a lot of sense. After all, many folks dare not be open about their sexuality where they live and work for fear of job loss and social troubles. And even if they do dare, it can be hard to make connections with others.

These are things my protagonist Lonnie Squires faces constantly–the fear of having her life go all to hell if she outs herself. The belief as she looks around her that even if she did come out, she’d be the only one. A serious lack of community.

Maybe Lonnie needs to get a facebook account. That could provide plenty of scary stuff for an upcoming book! What would I call it? Faced. Booked. Networked to Death.

Anybody have any ideas about why homosexuals use social networks so much more than straight folks?

Here’s a shot from the screen when it was announced!

It was a great evening even before this announcement.  Bella author Karin Kallmaker won two awards–it was a great night for Bella.

Bonus:  the award for best mystery was presented by none other than Kate Clinton, so I got to meet her (or at least hug her and say thanks).

Double bonus, the incomparable Mark Doty, who has been a great inspiration to me for years because of the beauty of his writing, also won a Lambda for poetry, and it was a huge honor for me to follow him to the podium.

Triple bonus:  I have to admit, I found the clutch to be most serviceable for the evening.  Thanks to YOSista for loaning it to me.

ADAM LAMBERT WAS HERE TODAY!!

My informant was wrong–he was on the Today Show today, which I found out when I woke up and turned on the t.v. at 9:30 this morning.  I dressed and pretty much ran to Rockefeller Center.  Missed the outside singing.

Sad.

BUT!  Adam and Kris were on the Kathie Lee and Hoda show at 10, and though I didn’t hear them sing live or really even see them through the window (because the KLG and Hoda show is upstairs) I could see the studio lights and I knew they were there.  Plus, we could see them on the outside monitors.  Therefore, I can faithfully claim I was within 50 feet of Adam and Kris.  So that’s a grand thing.

I ate in Rockefeller Center and took the B train uptown to St. John the Divine.  Wonderful.  I could spend a whole day there.  Grabbed wonderful food to go from an Amish Market and found a free place to post and check the internet (none in my hotel!  In NYC!  Can you believe it?) So now it’s back at the hotel to shower, rest, change and GO to the Lammy event!!!

What a day it’s been already. 

Won’t be able to update until sometime tomorrow when this little free internet spot reopens!

 Left the midwest in an astonishing downpour–the kind where it rains so hard it sounds like rocks are hitting your car.  Also a damp spirit as I heard from a friend that ADAM LAMBERT was on the Today Show this morning and I’d miss him by just a few hours.

 New York is drier, but overcast and foggy.  I walked down to the Empire State Building (which is right across the street from where the Lammy Awards Ceremony will be tomorrow night) and couldn’t see anywhere near the top.

I had a bagel with Nova lox for breakfast in Grand Central Station, so I feel like I’ve arrived.   Then I went straight to the New York Public Library, where I’d never been before.  They have many treasures, including a Declaration of Independence in Jefferson’s handwriting, and a  great collection of 20th century dime novels and comic books.  On the third floor, in the hall outside the great reading room, was a great timeline display of the gay rights movement, particularly focusing on Stonewall and the Liberation of Christopher Street.  Reading the weeklies, the fliers, and the letters from folks fighting the good fight in 1969 and 1970 was quite moving, especially in light of the horrible Supreme Court decision in California yesterday.   Topped the visit off with a visit to the Children’s Reading Room, where the original toys that inspired A. A. Milne to write Winnie the Pooh are housed.  That was a lovely surprise for me!

I also walked by the Episcopal Center, home base of the national church offices and checked out their little bookstore. 

Ate at Don Giovanni’s–great home-cooked Italian food, huge portions, relatively cheap.  It’s on 44th near 9th–one restaurant I always visit whenever I’m in NYC.

Walked up Broadway and down 5th in the evening–including time in the brand new Times Square pedestrian mall.  The city has put lawn chairs in the middle of the former street.  It’s a blast to sit an watch people and signs and traffic and everything.

Tomorrow will be fun!

The luggage is all packed and sitting in the hallway, causing earth-shattering consternation to the household pets.  One of the cats even stole my wallet this morning, but I found it before he dispersed the credit cards all over the back porch.  They love their sitter, but the luggage still freaks them out.

Flying freaks me out, but I’m promising myself not to expend the energy tomorrow when I leave the house at 3 a.m. (!) to get to the airport on time.  I’ll need all my focus just to get in the right lines and not wind up in Maui.  Which wouldn’t be bad, but it isn’t where the award shindig is happening.

Last night I put on my ceremony clothes and made sure I would be comfortable and functional.  Why in God’s name are women’s dress clothes never both?  The clutch I borrowed will barely serve–it’ll hold a lip gloss (my fancy make-up for the evening) and maybe a phone, but not a phone and camera.  And of course, the clothes have no pockets.  I won’t get started on my fashion rant here.  It’s only one evening.  I’ll survive.  In fact, I’ll enjoy it–I’m really looking forward to the whole to-do.  What an experience it will all be!  Cocktails at 6, awards at 7, after party at 9:30.   More social life than I usually have in a month.

And I’m spending an extra two days in New York City, which I’m really looking forward to.  I hope to walk a lot, shop, eat cheap city food, and visit some Episcopal sights (always researching for Lonnie’s future adventures!).

I’ll update from there if I can, otherwise, check back in a few days!

It’s about a teddy bear who has willed himself to live only to be arrested for being the most heinous terrorist mastermind.   Yes, really.  As the official website says:

Emotionally gripping and intellectually compelling, Winkie introduces the most memorable protagonist since the Velveteen Rabbit, and—with the help of a lesbian Moslem cleaning woman, a stuttering attorney, and a Lacan-spewing bear cub—brilliantly exposes the cruel absurdities of our age and explores what it means to be human in an increasingly barbaric world.

It’s a strange book.  I loved it.  Mostly I wondered what sort of creative bravery it took to write it and to believe that it had a chance in hell of getting published.  If I had an idea like this I would never, ever believe it would see the light of day at a publishing house.

I would love to have seen the face of the agents/editors who first saw this thing.  How many times (if any?) was it rejected?  Who had the guts to buy it and what made the risk worth taking?  Kudos to those visionaries.

This, of course, reveals a great deal about my own writing life–particularly the stuff I don’t write.  I’ve often thought that’s a problem.  Now that I see it written out like this, I feel that more strongly than ever.  I need to write my winkies too!  Even if I don’t think there’s a chance they’ll ever get published.  I should let the world decide that, not me.

Hm.  Quite a little pep talk for myself.  What do you think?  Do you guys give yourselves pep talks?  Do you writers out there write your winkies?

I rather like that phrase, that call to arms:  WRITE YOUR WINKIES!

I wonder if Chase would mind?

I voted 101 times for Adam last week.  I’ve never voted more than a dozen times in a season before this one.   Then I bought tickets to see the tour.  Next, I’ll buy an Adam Lambert t-shirt.  I probably should check the web . . .

I haven’t gotten all geeky-fan about anyone in a long time.  It’s kinda fun.  Now I know why all those twelve year-old girls do it!  What a rush!  It’s gotta be good for burning calories.

Last week’s Entertainment Weekly had a super-smart cover story–it claimed to be about Adam, but it was really about the silencing that surrounds so many gay or maybe-gay folks–and the impact it has on all of us when they can’t share their lives the way everyone else can.  Something I feel every day.  Probably many of you do too, living in a heterocentric world.

A lot of folks haven’t heard about this yet and a lot of others are looking for good sources to find out more about what’s going on with Amazon’s exclusion of adult titles from the sales rankings and its effect on gay and lesbian books.  Here’s some of the best I’ve found so far, so I thought I’d share (source:  the Lambda Literary Foundation website).

LLF Statement on Amazon Controversy

April 13, 2009–In response to the recent uproar over Amazon’s deranking of “adult” titles and its effect on LGBT books, Board President Christopher Rice has released this statement:

“Lambda Literary Foundation applauds the diligent work of writers, bloggers and activists in calling attention to this deeply distressing turn of events. I have seen my first novel stripped of its sale ranking by this apparent computer glitch so I join other writers who are baffled to the point of anger. I take great solace in the quick mobilization of our community in response to this apparent marginalization of LGBT books; the grassroots power of the Internet has been placed on glorious display for all to see. Over the next few days, we at Lambda Literary will be monitoring the situation very closely. Amazon is one of our nation’s largest general book retailers. In their commitment to creating and sustaining technological advances in the publishing industry, they have laid claim to the future of book distribution. As such, they have a pressing responsibility to create an unfettered exchange of stories and ideas. If a quick and decisive response to this problem is not forthcoming within the next few days, we at Lambda Literary look forward to leading a sustained and impassioned dialogue on this issue, which will seek to harness the energies that have been released by our community’s admirable response.”

Hear Christopher Rice discuss Amazon on NPR’s All Things Considered.

See related articles at The Advocate’s website.